Finding Queer Joy in Small-Town Arkansas: My Bentonville Story
Ever wonder what it's like being the only person with a Pride flag on your street in a small Southern town? That was me three years ago when I moved to Bentonville, Arkansas—terrified, hopeful, and completely unprepared for what came next.
My Bentonville Beginning
I arrived in Northwest Arkansas for a job at the museum, thinking I'd stay six months tops. The first week, I nervously ordered coffee at Onyx, rainbow pin barely visible on my jacket, when the barista whispered, "Nice pin. There's a queer meetup at Bike Rack Brewing next Thursday if you're interested." That small moment changed everything.
When Finding Community Feels Impossible
Let's be honest about the struggles:
- Dating apps show the same 12 people within a 50-mile radius
- Well-meaning coworkers who keep trying to set you up with their "other gay friend"
- The constant calculation about when/where it's safe to be yourself
- That isolating feeling when national queer conversations don't reflect rural realities
Creating Space Where There Isn't Any
What helped me thrive here:
- Start ridiculously small—my first "queer dinner" had three people
- Connect with the Crystal Bridges community—surprisingly inclusive
- Explore Fayetteville when Bentonville feels too small
- Find allies at places like Mama Carmen's and The Record
- Remember that visibility itself is revolutionary here
The queer community in Bentonville isn't huge, but it's mighty. You're not imagining the challenges, but you're also not alone in facing them. Our stories matter precisely because they're happening in unexpected places.
Share your Bentonville queer experience below—or if you're just visiting, let me know and I'll send my not-so-secret list of queer-friendly spots!