Finding My Rainbow in Suburban Indiana
Have you ever felt like the only splash of color in a beige painting? That was me, three years ago, when I first moved to Carmel, Indiana—a place known more for roundabouts than rainbow flags.
My Carmel Coming Out Story
I still remember the knot in my stomach walking into that first neighborhood cookout. Everyone was so nice, but I kept my partner references gender-neutral until Mrs. Henderson from two doors down directly asked about "my husband." The silence felt eternal before I replied, "Actually, my wife couldn't make it tonight." What followed wasn't the awkwardness I feared but genuine inclusion that still surprises me today.
When Being Yourself Feels Revolutionary
Living authentically here comes with unique challenges:
- The subtle double-takes at the grocery store when holding hands
- Finding your people in spaces not explicitly designed for us
- Navigating well-meaning but sometimes exhausting questions
- Being the "educational opportunity" for allies wanting to learn
Creating Your Queer Oasis
You are not alone here. I've discovered that Carmel has quiet pockets of incredible LGBTQ+ community—you just need to know where to look. The monthly potlucks at Central Park pavilion, the surprisingly inclusive faith communities, and even our little book club that started with two and grew to fifteen queer and allied readers.
What's your Carmel experience been like? Drop a comment below or DM me if you need connections to our little rainbow family here in the suburbs. Sometimes finding your people means becoming the person you needed when you arrived. ♥️