Finding My Queer Family in the Most Unexpected Place
Have you ever felt like the only rainbow in a black and white world? That was me, standing in the middle of Westfield State University's quad, wondering if I'd made a terrible mistake coming to small-town Massachusetts.
My Westfield Journey
When I first moved to Westfield three years ago, I counted exactly zero pride flags on my drive through downtown. The Colonial-style houses and historic landmarks were charming, but I couldn't help wondering: where were my people? Then I discovered the tiny LGBTQ+ book club that meets at Skyline Trading Co. on Thursday evenings. Six people around a table discussing Alison Bechdel changed everything for me.
The Invisible Tightrope We Walk
Let's be honest about the challenges:
- Dating apps that show the same 12 people within a 50-mile radius
- The constant mental calculation of when/where it's safe to hold hands
- The well-meaning but exhausting questions from locals who've "never met a real gay person before"
- Finding community spaces that aren't just bars
Creating Home Where You Are
What I've learned is that queer community in smaller places isn't always visible—it's created. Start small:
- Check out Northampton's queer scene just 20 minutes away
- Join the Western Mass Queer Exchange on social media
- Volunteer at the annual Westfield Pride picnic at Hampton Ponds
- Become the representation you wish you had seen
Remember, your existence here matters. Each of us who lives authentically makes it easier for someone else to do the same.
What's your Westfield story? Share below how you found (or are still searching for) your people here. Your comment might be exactly what another person needs to read today.